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101% funny Status, im sure you will laugh and enjoy

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Define A woman…. . . . . . Someone who can talk 4 hours while standing at the door . . . but she won’t sit … Because shes getting late…: -- FUNNY ULTIMATE TRUTHS : 1. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock. 2. The road to success is always under construction ;-) 3. In order to get a loan, you first need to prove that you don’t need it :-P 4. All the desireable things in life are either illegal, expensive or married :-P 5. Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate :-D Enjoy life ! :-) -- Girl: Which Laptop do u have..? Boy : I have a HP G-62 with Intel core i3 processor 2.3 Ghz, Windows 7, 64 bit.. 2 Gb RAM & Intel 1 Gb graphics Card.. And Which laptop do u have..? Girl: Pink colour ka.. :P -- At A ‘PAKISTAN’ Bus Stand, An American DoctOr gOt Heart Attack after Reading a BoOk’s Name..!! Guess The Name Of that BoOk..?? . . . . . . . . . “How tO Become A DOCTOR in 30Days”.. Rs 150/- -- I just hate y0u! Go away.. Why The Hell You Keep Coming Again And Again… . . . . . . . Monday?! Disturbed Sunday.. =P =D -- My SCIENCE book says & i agree.. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . “CELL” is the basic, fundamental unit of life.. :-D :-P -- When You Really Want To Slap Someone, Do It And Say…… , , , , ,, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , Mosquito. :D:P -- Amazing truth : When your mom decides to be in your room while you are on the computer.. . You just switch to GOOGLE and stare at it..!! :P :D ;-) -- Dear lays manufacturer U forgot to mention one more thing in the list of ur ingredients. . . . . . . Air 85% :D -- I am Looking for a Bank which can perform Two things for me. Give me a Loan, & then Leave me aLone…!: :-) :-P -- My wallet is like an onion; whenever I open it. It makes me cry -- Father: I have seen you love your mum more than me. Do you love me or your mum more? Son: I love both of you equally much. Father: What if I go America and your mum goes to Paris, where will you go? Son: Paris of course, it is much beautiful there. Father: Then what if I go Paris and your mum goes America, where will you go? Son: America! Father: So you’re bent on following your mum? Son: No, it’s because I already went to Paris! --- how to kill an Engineering student…. . . . . . . . . . . . Just pour water on his record book one day before submission!! Mar Jayega!! ;) -- Zindgi ki keemat ka Andaza maut ke bad hi hota hai…. ? ? ? ? ? ? For exampal… zinda murga Rs. 85/- Aur chicken tandoori Rs. 230/- per plate…. -- When a Guy does Something Wrong… Girl : You broke my Favorite Lamp !!! Boy : It was an Accident… I didn’t mean to..!! Girl : I can’t believe you did this. Boy : I’m Sorry.. !! When a Girl does Something Wrong… Boy : You Lost My Dog??!!! Girl : It was an Accident… I didn’t mean to..!! Boy : I can’t believe you did this. Girl : I already feel bad about it..!! Stop making me feel Worse..!! Boy : I’m Sorry.. !! -- One night a boy healped an unknow aunty to reach her home. aunty:-beta raat bahut ho gai hai yanhi so jao,bittu ke room me. boy:-nahi aunty may hall me so jaungi. next morning a beautiful girls come with a cup of coffe. boy:-aap koun? girl:-mai bittu aur aap? boy:-mai gadha ullu ka pathha.GUD NA8 -- How Come The Dove Gets To Be The Peace Symbol ? How About Pillow ? It Has More Feathers, Than The Dove And It Doesn?t Have That Dangerous Beak ? ;-> -- Funny but true fact.. . . Relationship between lovers in today’s age:- you can touch each other.. but . . . . . . . . . . u cannot touch each other’s mobile..! -- Teacher: ?Johnny, Im Glad To See Your Writing Has Improved.? Johnny: ?Thank You? Teacher: ?Now, Finally, I Can See How Bad Your Spellings Are!!!? -- Question by a student !! If a single teacher can’t teach us all the subjects, Then… How could you expect a single student to learn all subjects ? -- Tech Joke- All Samsung Officials Are Withdrawing Their Children From School, As The First Thing Children Are Being Taught Is ___ . . . ?A for Apple? =P =D --